I love my bros weed
Im gonna hate it in like 20 mins though
Drank beer out of a hotwheels bucket all night
from now on when you get up to pee in the middle of the night, check to see if im sleeping in your parking lot.
i do.
when i grow up i'm putting garbage disposals in all showers of my house so when you vomit in the shower its easy clean up
He's engaged. If the world's smallest penis can find true love than I can too.
He didn't seem too mad about the puke on the side of his car. You still have a chance.
FACT: the parking lot attendant was yelling "NO SEX HERE! NO SEX" at yall.
If we break up, I want weekend visitations with your penis.
he was definitely TRYING to give me herpes.
i'm hungover but need to study so i had a vodka orange juice, three ibuprofen and an adderall for breakfast. what up med school
He's only done it missionary. His world is about to be rocked. Do you know what I look like from behind?
Sorry, I was watching the Olympic story about the Canadian guy and drinking out of the prescription bottle and crying because it was so beautiful.
you dont know your limits until you wake up with a black eye and a bruised rib and find out you got ran over by a bicycle last night
I'm really ok with inappropriate relationships. They are my favorite of all the relationships. No need to be timid. For crying out loud.
I'm still questioning who dropped me off last night. So successful wedding?
Randomize
