I'm youtube-ing children's choirs. Am I adorable? Or am I a child predator?
Predator. Straight up.
it was really awkward. it took him like like 2 minutes to realize who he was jacking off to. he stopped mid-stroke. such a small small world
i told you not to try chat roulette
I got to the point where it seemed like she had 8 giant breasts instead of just two
All I know is I woke up next to her beside the toilet
i find it unbelievable that you didn't think it was necessary to intervene when i started letting people autograph my body with spray tan.
Sitting in back of morning lecture drinking a daqueri from my pink unicorn cup. Pretty sure the girl next to me smells it.
Ive fucked up. im like a feral dog rabidly chasing an infrequent dream amidst a cataclysm of disaster
you threw me on the ground pryed my purse out of my hands screaming " I JUST WANNA HOLD IT A LITTLE BIT". later i found you putting on my lip gloss.
The porch is breathing.
STAY OUT OF MY SHROOMS YOU CUNT
I manage to fit my wine bottle in my koozie and the rest is history
You gotta have 1 orgasm for me and the rest can be for you. I'm living vicariously through you 😂
HOW THE FUCK IS IT POSSIBLE THAT THE JUNIOR HIGH STUDENT IS BETTER AT BEING AN ADULT THAN I AM!?!?
i black out too much to be "responsible"
no fucks will be given and no pants will be worn
i'll bring the vodka
She's writing hockey erotica again.
Tell her to pick another team besides ours this time.
Randomize
