dude this 15 year old girl saw our youtube vid and just facebook messaged me saying i was verry verry pretty. i have no schemas for how to respond to this situation.
woah 15?
i know! what is this dateline?
I wish costco sold astroglide.
i wish my brain was less awake, and didn't try and picture what you were talking about.
A disheveled girl in front of me just looked down, shrieked, and yelled to the girl next to her "what is this" while pointing at two large white stains near the crotch of her black jeans. I love that Thursdays are weekends, it makes awesome Friday mornings
it went kinda like vodka, childhood memories, screaming/cursing, fist fight, tears, broken shit, passing out. in that order. tis the season.
honestly, i'm just crying in the kitchen naked and eating salsa
he kept saying that we were in ian's fun time place and then continued to act like a dinosaur.
Talked to Nate, told him he was a douche. Will give details when sober. It's ok. You're my best friend together a wolf pack. Olive juice.
i am one fart away from being 2 for 2 on this whole shitting my pants thing.
Dude I just came exactly at the crescendo of the Catalina wine mixer duet from step brothers.. Advance to next level.
There was a huge crash. I came out of my room to find you sprawled out at the bottom of the stairs in your bra and panties. You looked at me, yelled 'WHAT AM I DOING WITH MY LIFE' and then ran back into his room.
I repeat do not go to a jail visit drunk, those stools are easy to fall off.
My 1st STD. I feel like there should be a cake for this.
Whenever a guy asks me why I like weird sex stuff, I just answer, "Catholic School".
I will literally have glitter in my crotch for weeks.
she prefaced telling me she was pregnant with "houston, we have a problem"
Randomize
