I wanna go to beed woth a nboy
Dual, econ, hell, shiv, aunt, puppy. 1 out of 6. T9 word needs to learn how to cuss like me.
He threw a goldfish cracker into my toilet and then proceeded to laugh for 32 minutes. I timed it.
i would only ever fuck harry potter if he was on a broomstick.
that knocking you heard last night......that was her head slowly going through the wall
Im like a co-bf. he pays for her birthday and christmas, but i get all the action.
I just asked the dr if it was herpes while wearing my shirt from the strip club...
I told you to stay away from the strippers in Oklahoma
When I opened my laptop there was a half eaten little debbie oatmeal cream pie inside.
Chasing 100 proof soco w water from the tap at 4 pm, it's gonna one of those kinda Thursdays...
When I ask you to make sure no ones coming while I'm changing.. The logical friend would keep watch. But you my, best friend come stand in front of me and flash everybody.
110% paid for our cab with a lap dance
It's really sad that I'm trying to calculate in my head the type of place to have dinner that's worth anal
....I feel like you are deciding whether or not I'm good enough for you based on what I ordered from Chipotle.
You are the voice of reason. And I'm bringing wine. Like seriously this is his last chance. Don't touch me once, shame on you.. Don't touch me twice, shame on me
But you put your finger in my ass and the rest is history
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