do you ever lay in the bath and watch the blood hit the water?
EWW. Don't discuss your period with me. You can go shave your back now.
dude, showing up drunk to physics was the best idea ever. I just tripled my participation for the semester. I love st pattys day
Dude I think I was making out with the cat last night
I don't have a cat..?
Well nonetheless. Whatever it was purred when I used tounge.
i have one question about last night
if this is about your fridge being filled with hotdogs, sour cream, and PB&J open-faced sandwiches, i can explain
she was like the girl next door.. if you lived next door to a whorehouse
also: i found my "nug jug", actually the baby did, but either way it got returned to its rightful owner
So....maintenance found the bullethole.....
After 12 shots he decided to show us knife tricks. You can figure out how it ended
My brother just asked if I would keep having one nighters with that guy because he really likes the organic cotton v-necks he leaves behind.
Is it wrong that I want to do a nude photo shoot with nothing but a light saber?
never planned on seeing last weekend's one night stand again, much less be on the same plane as him..
He said he loves me but he haven't eaten me out yet. So I don't think he means it.
I sit across from him at graduation so I get to stare at him and think about how I fucked his step brother and laugh to myself
You know those times when you're sitting down for a while and r like damn I'm sober but then stand up and r like WOAH HOLD UP.
I just woke up in a prom dress on your bathroom floor, yea I'm 32.
Randomize
