Rock
Scissors
Fuck
Just saw the true definition of the muffin top and camel toe all on one person at the DC zoo... Tried to take a pic but she got away..
you kept running across the street. everytime you made it across successfully you took something off. can't believe there were no cops around...
oh thats it?
I'm pregaming before our pregaming dinner...with peanut butter and beer. I think I need to re-evaluate my budget...
Just the budget?
I know. I almost started crying. IN WHAT UNIVERSE IS THAT A TURN ON?!
OHMYGOD did I try to use pinesol as a mixer?
I just wanted to share with you that my life has come to naked arts and crafts, to fix my flask, with a rum and coke in my hand... Good luck on your exam
The milf did the body paint, come to the bar
Was it just me or did you also find it awkward when "glad you came" started playing on pandora right after you finished?
Just peed off a cliff while playing white snake on my phone. Close enough?
I just called my boyfriend "Dad"... Awkward
I knew my sister shouldn't have gone to the bacherlotte party. Two of the other brides maids have black eyes and my fiancé called me and asked if this is the crazy she's marrying
I have wine with a bendy straw bitches I can do fucking anything
Don't drink and try to take a shower. I thought I was drowning
She then told me, and I quote "I want to send you nudes just to see how you'd react."
Randomize
