JOSHUA! WE ARE SO BREAKING UP!
what?
YOU'RE DRUNK AGAIN, ARENT YOU?!
I was happy to be the center of attention..until i realized why everyone was staring
i just burped and it tasted like condom. please tell me i wasn't lame and made that guy wear one for a bj last night.
There is a pink thong attached to a bottle of svedka hanging from my ceiling fan..is this yours?
We literally played a game called pass the child which consisted of us shitfaced tossing the 5 year old birthday boy at each other
fuck your need to drink for whitney a thousand times last night.
So, we bought a knight today. Nearly life size. Hes in the garage, so don't be startled.
There was booze on his face and I wanted it. I'm not sorry.
dude he's still passed out in my bathtub. and his dick is half way in a 40 bottle... i really hope he was just trying to piss in it
This is not a costume party, I'm just wearing fairy wings.
Of course you are.
You haven't lived until you've snorted coke from a Pharaoh's hand baby
Would you accept a fantastic blowjob as payment?
I think I've done enough damage with my vagina as of late, thank you
i made out with his shirt. MDMA, man.
There's just something classy about smoking a blunt in a prom dress.
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