I was just at the urinal, started to go, then farted, then said oh yea out loud, then heard someone move in the stall behind me
you hand the children out the window. i'll pour the drinks.
Wait time out. Did I start last night with pants?
If I buy you $300 worth of popeyes, will that make up for me trashing the house?
Watched a women out our tannin salon literally fight police because she was getting arrested for trying to drunkenly fight the tanning salon owner...we need to step up our day drinking this is shameful.
My new dealer is 16. I have been getting high longer than he has been alive.
I don't see the problem
i wish i just like had a pee bag attached to me and i could just go whenever i want wherever i want
I guess I can give it a shot. I usually just get belligerently drunk and go where my penis and feet lead me. No fights or getting too lost, so they seem to be doing a good job
Stop touching yourself.
Wtf!?!?!?! Did you install a camera???
You're the third Mark I've fucked in that bed.
He just used the word frick. Is that a possible red flag?
Does your Fitbit monitor your liver failure?
I don't want to be drunk any more. Can you hit the off switch?
you had her IN YOUR BED NO PANTS AND YOU GAVE HER THW BOOT?!?!?!
Stage five clinger bro. had to go.
Officially hit an ultimate low today. I was so hung-over I threw up on the ground in front of the jousting display in the London tower. But on a positive note, Brits are very understanding when you vomit on their history.
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