You know how my eyes change color? Well I noticed after I hook up with someone my eyes are greener.
Wow, so you're like the Edward Cullen of sluts.
I don't know if I want to cry scream puke or go somewhere and drink more. This is such a weird emotion.
I think i smell like relationship. That's my problem.
I think I want to impress his gay best friend more than him..
yea talk to her if you feel up to it. Just remember who you are
Oh shit sorry I just gave lion king advice sorry not mufasa
the straight edge chick smoked with me, because according to her my bowl is pretty
Its not often you get to say, "The security guard at my job is my new drug dealer," but as of last night, I get to say it.
I was fed cake in bed and then was pinned down and ridden till I came. And then fed more cake. I'm going to marry Brad. I'll put money on it.
I'm trying to get laid this Halloween, not inspire the next season of AHS
Whoever was doing lines off my iPad is a dick. Also bring Gatorade, for I hunger
For Who flesh?
I just did the math technically I'll be drunk until 2:30-3:00pm
this is the fourth time i've taken my clothes off for money this year. is that normal for the average college sophomore?
It's 7am. I'm sitting on the curb in last nights clothes with a nose bleed and no idea how to get home. Low moment I feel.
Love that I’m sending my uber driver a thank you message for taking me home via mcdonalds tonight before I’m messaging my date from tonight! Lol
We could just go to Vegas and celebrate my singlehood and not contributing to the population.
Randomize
