Fucking hipsters really piss me off man. They are just such punk as bitches, all of them. Oh, and fuck Ed Hardy too.
i told my grandma i broke up with my boyfriend. her reply " you need to play the field more anyway"
Words of wisdom-never eat a peanut-butter covered banana on a construction site ever again
He taught me how to drive a stick by using his dick. He even made the whurrrr noise so I knew when to change gears.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Please don't tell me I was shouting "I'm bleeding from my vagina" in front of my ex-boyfriend and his new girlfriend.
i just wasnt prepared to have the baby of one of two french firemen. threesomes are too confusing.
Just bought a beer belt to complete the Captain America outfit. I will do my part as a hero of America to pass out beer to the good citizens of America.
Not sure. All I know is that she has a tight dark green skirt and I will not rest until I have used my teeth to rip it off of her
Just consider it? What else do you have going on today that could be as awesome as a day full of lord of the rings and sex?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It was awk he was sittin on a plastic backyard chair in his underwear and high white socks in the dark watching the nuggets game
Mom got high last night and started crying because she feels bad for Paula Deen. This is my family.
My mom is selling her car. I'm secretly relieved I won't ever have to tell her about that time you puked in it
Moral of the story: fuckboys never change
I have to sleep with him. We're too much alike. It's like clash of the titans, except instead of clashing, he's putting it in me.
they gave me money. the money smells like weed. also they gave me weed
Randomize