if you wake up with plaid pants on your floor in the morning, you made a bad decision.
just tell him i said nine months
Im drinkin out of a coconut! I think im gonna dip my balls in it!
I just realized that when I walk away people probably say "wow she really has a drinking problem" and sadly it doesn't bother me.
You're not pinnochio. Lying isn't going to make it bigger.
hey. who tried to drive me home last night?
not sure. we got lost. what do you mean "tried"?
i'm still in their car. parked on the beach. no one else is here. i have on different pants.
she was puking into the toilet drowning herself saying "its okay im a swimmer"
josh has a chalupa in his pocket if you're hungry.
Get your clothes on you are our DD for the night. The usual three way payment
I am so stoned. And there are so many white people in this Jack in the Box.
What type of bandaid should I use on my clit
I don’t know what he is but he sure can suck a lollipop.
I wore my lizzie mcguire socks to the bar last night. Because that's how i get all the ladiez
After we finish having sex, he smokes an honest to God pipe. It's like fucking a big, sexy Sherlock Holmes...
She was shaving her legs in the neighbors pool when we found her.
Where'd she get the razor?
Not the point.
Randomize
