ashley and jimmy are about to have sex on degrassi.... EVERYONES GETTING LAID BUT ME
she asked me if I wanted a handjob on the haunted mansion ride at Disney. was I suposed to say no?
I learned his name tonight. This now makes him a real person. Obviously, I no longer want to sleep with him.
i felt horrible..i wanted to somehow give him his vcard back
that's a non refundable transaction sweetheart
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Here. I am here. I do not know where here is but it includes condom balloons, a keg castle, and a shaved goat. Do not find me...I am in post blackout heaven.
I just dropped macaroni right down my cleavage. For the sake of our future, I'm really banking on this being a turn on for you.
Walk of Shame'd halfway down a mountain, skiiers passing. Do not drink with lifties at the end of ski season.
they won't let me drive with my sombrero
I just realized, I'm going to be on my period for the end of the world. FUCK.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Happy meals everywhere. I think Ronald McDonald Claus visited.
I'm at the local community college pretending to be a substitute for a computer applications class
I don't remember coming in last night, but apparently I ate a piece of pizza because when I woke up I had pizza crust stuck to the back of my thighs.
I just lit a blunt like right in front of an old man and I was like sir please shieldeth your eyes
This whole pope visit thing is ruining me having sex.
Ps he swallowed my earring last night so yeah
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