How do I say "sorry I gave you and your sister herpes" in German?
i have this theory that all the people in the world who dont like mayonnaise had very bad encounter with jizz once
Vibrator and massage oils got stopped at security. Super.
There are bud lights poping out of the zipper of my overnight bag and my dildo almost fell out in the elevator. not professional
I will not ride trays down a flight of stairs topless and drunk....
THAT DOESN'T MEAN YOU SHOULD LET ME CHUG VODKA.
if i can get a chik with a dibaetes pump naked a sling certainly isnt going to get in my way
Vodka shot parachutes
Fucking utilizing a thrid story dorm room
I cannot tell if the couch is cold or I spilled beer. THAT kind of night.
We definitely need to avoid these "I'm gonna get stabbed if I stay here any longer" partys
We built a fire and had sex in the kiddie pool. Then he washed my hair
Strong work
Or stump rather since he's possibly large. Large penises don't have tips, just blunt ends of battering rams.
DO NOT SLAP ANYONE WITH ANY VEGAN MEAT PATTIES
He also reminds me slightly of a pirate which i find strangely attractive
you can see where the duct tape was on my nipple
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