If lil wayne asked you to lick him like a lollipop I feel that you would willingly oblige.
Unfortunately I think I would lick most anyone's lollipop.
It's your form of community service; servicing the greater SDSU area.
the bank didn't screw up, i spent 150$ at mcdonalds last night
I said make yourselves at home, not to put a used condom on my ceiling fan.
He's tryingto open a beer with a Police baton. Cut him off or see where this leads?
Carpe scrotum. Grab life by the balls.
I need to stop treating my body like that of a Vegas hooker on vacation in Ibiza
he asked me to "shake his dick" when he introduced himself, playing naked football with you in our living room. $100 says you two get married one day.
My walk of shame this morning would have been much less obvious if it hadn't been 6:30 in the morning and I wasn't walking through downtown Nashville in a Steeler jersey.
Do you remember ripping my condom off last night while yelling "I DEMAND MY MEAT RAW" like a Viking?
I'm gonna try and get through this weekend sober, which is gonna be tough especially since I've already started drinking.
My prof handed me back my essay on Lesbians in literature, gave me an A and then we had sex in her office. Told you she was gay.
So I decided to sleep with him for the first time in months so I can convince him it's his kid instead of the other guy
We had an argument over whether or not she had super strength. She settled it by dragging me to the bed room and throwing me on the bed. Then forcefully fucking me. She won the argument.
I gave him one of my famous hand jobs.
I sent him nudes while he is at work because I am an evil human being.
Randomize
