on a scale of one to ten, how awkward would it i told him i had to go change my tampon and then left?
11
no its okay don't call 911, she's alive. just stopped by her house and banged on her door. she said she turned her phone off because she "had to be alone with her shame and embarassment". typical.
i think you're the only person in the world who masturbates to food network.
Let's review the facts-we're bored, we have a ton of beer, and we live 5 minutes from the zoo. This equation is easily solvable
I just negotiated a blow job for an interview.
Tell your boyfriend I'm sorry for ruining his vein. I'm never drawing blood drunk again.
A 300 lb dude in a sundress yelling bible verses while wearing a raggedy anne wig is just as funny as I thought it would be. Thank you san francisco.
Holy mother of cocks. I was grind-with-my-boss drunk last night.
She came over and gave me a handy and then just lingered for a day and a half. Worst weekend ever.
Do you think blood ever gets sick of carrying all these drugs around?
Like, there are so many different things we make it do, and it just wants to settle down and be a one-drug fluid?
Stop reading WebMD high.
someone snapchatted me a porn of two guys dressed up as pterodactyls double teaming a girl
I woke up in the bathtub with money shoved down my pants. I must've done something right.
You're supposed to discourage my sluttiness not bring me hot Colombian men
A girl in McDonalds just asked if I was in here wasted a few nights ago throwing fries at the staff, I said it was my twin
We both know that wasn't me
Video on mandys page of you drinking upside down was finally put up...too bad all the comments were about me and him fighting in the background while he screamed "BLOW BIG BETSY!'
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