dude we were spooning naked in bed with her ass in my crotch. she sharted in her sleep all over my dick.
chick im bringing home just asked our cab driver if she could do a line off his turban. i think im in love - or trouble.
I plan on putting pajamas back on after I shower. Today is going to be awesome.
i could't wear that belt anymore, it was gonna make me keep shitting for the rest of the night
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's always exciting to touch a new boob.
should i go to class, or party with a mariachi band?
meriachi band is very tempting, do they have dos equis?
PAAAANTS ARE FOR AAAASSHOLES
I believe in weed hangovers. To say the least.
but seriously, if you see a redhead running down the street tonight in a carrot costume, call 911. He's tripping hard.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Omg she's a human wrecking ball. I love it.
I am to reach this level of casual destruction.
I'm definitely single now but she stole my mailbox
He had a hook in his ceiling. I think I'm in love!
I just want to smoke weed and be the little spoon all winter. My modern day hibernation.
Is it sad to eat a candy bra by yourself?
you were acting out moves from the wwe, in a dress. then you sceamed "you can't see me" and ran out of the apt.
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