Who has a tranny cab driver? I have a tranny cab driver.
the ***** family is living proof that there are no more lifeguards in the humen gene pool
that was after robitussin, alcohol, and chocolate sauce... but before we finished pregaming
i was sitting in the back seat of her car with her boyfriend while she was driving. it was pretty awkward, but i dont think "so my dick's been in your girl's mouth too" was a good ice breaker
I don't know what's more pathetic, the fact that you dated him or the fact that it took a Taylor Swift song for you to break up with him.
I just made a milkshake without a blender... thats determination
dude...I wrote 15 jersey shore quotes on her body. she is going to do the walk of shame with snookie on her forehead.
at least 'blackout me' had enough sense to take the puke covered duvet off the comforter.
I woke up naked, with the lights on, using my backpack as a pillow and a pillow as a blanket.
The word cocktail makes me want to rip my liver out and nail it to a cross.
I managed to make myself a bowl of apple jacks, took one bite and had to stop eating them because they were making my brain wiggle. How was your comedown?
well apparently i was just calling everyone cunts. then i awoke from my blackout to 3 very mad roommates who didn't bring a key out with them
American Eric just peed on us from the second floor. Hes now very confused as to why his "toilet is yelling." Send help.
Just saw a government minister puke and rally.
He wants Portugal to lose so badly he threw out all the sangria. You know how depressing it is to watch someone dump 4 gallons of heaven?
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