Yeah true. Damn vaginas. They're ruining the world.
i was watching some porn this morning and i realized i am blessed with a truly beautiful vagina
Aparently his snake got loose in the middle of the night. Not a sex joke, he has a fucking snake
Just hooked up on shake weight girl's dad's porsche. What are YOU doing with your life?
To say he's a good fuck is like saying the beatles had a bit of success. My vag is still mourning the fact he moved.
Well some days you just have to get blackout drunk and try to speak Spanish to French Canadian strangers
No idea how he made them, but vodka water balloons were a horrible idea.
You know me. im down for anything that could harm my well being. lets dress like dolphins so everyone will see what dicks they are.
Great. Now I'm always going to be the roommate that boned a guy with a third nipple.
This wedding is gonna be a disaster. I already had to turn down one of the groomsmen who offered me $100 to sleep with him next wknd.
Too low?
Yes.
Swear to god our friendship has its limits. Stop peeing on the fucking refrigerator.
Jesus Christ that hit just spoke to so many levels of my soul. It's caressing them softly
Just screamed wow while using my vibrator.. new low
This is my second month of college and all I've learned is how to get a guy to go down on me without asking out loud and not to chase everclear with Smirnoff ice.
Essential life skills
And the you walked in and said to the only under age dude "IM NOT SLEEPING WITH YOU TONIGHT!!!" You may not have high standards but thanks for not sleeping with my brother!
Randomize
