redhead is getting on the bull...again red head is getting on the bull!
And now we have yet another reason to never travel to Detroit
I wonder sometimes what your vagina thinks about you.
I'm looking forward to the release of my future best seller - "Three Words to Make Your Relationship 100% Better: Surprise Blow Jobs"
I drunkenly called my ex on Skype last night and didn't talk, just smiled real big at him until I fell asleep.
Do you deliver to the black dark pit where I am? I think it's called.... The toilet? Right next to hell...
you know i have almost 1500 fb friends but not ONE drunk booty call?
Also, it was so cold in that bathroom that I saw my crap steaming, a first in my life
What guy invites over a booty call, gets all naked and then when the real fun begins and a condom is needed, claims to not have one? And wears socks THE entire time?
I'm determined to sit on that face.
His dick isn't even good enough to be this much of an asshole
I ate so much cake that I can't even enjoy a blowjob
That's the most first world problem I've ever heard in my life.
Why r u in my phone under "the last survivor"?
Maybe the "i killed someone" and "tequila makes my clothes come off" comments freaked him out.
We've been taking shots, cranking Marilyn Manson, and eating your bacon. Your kid is probably ruined.
Randomize
