Turns out you're obligated under man law to share any passwords you may have for porno sites
Is that what they're teaching u at that bar review class?
I have a critically important question to ask.
Why does watermelon-flavoured candy exist?
every time i wear that dress i get kicked out of a bar.
My patience ran out after you started clapping at the strippers everytime they took off a piece of clothing.
I can't believe I cried over a sausage mcmuffin.
I would literally rather jam a rusty rail road spike into my cock than be here right now. The whore showed up and now I might smash my iPhone into my face repeatedly until I'm no longer consisting of any sort of life.
That bar is one yeast infection away from total annihilation.
I just realized that in 3 weeks it becomes sad if I make everything into a drinking game. Fuck growing up
I'm 25 and I shit my bed last night. And I'm telling you about it. Not sure which is worse
DO NOT TOUCH THE SOAP ITS HAD SOME UNORTHODOX USES WITHIN THE PAST 15 HOURS
Apparently "Welcome to the Sin Cave" is not how I'm supposed to answer the door
I wish I could be the kind of drunk Bobbi is... She stumbles around outside at 4am with a broken high heel and babbling about rainbows and getting dick...
RESIST THE DICK
thats like telling me to resist drinking water. impossible.
I wish I had a tail.
Why?
...why not?
His dick is social distance approved
Social distance approved?
big enough for me to fuck from six feet away
Randomize
