Culvers...So Good
So good. The butter burgers slip right outta my ass.
We are so in love
so when's the next time you get to see your balls
Convinced the bartender that I'm a congressman. Free Drinks. God bless America.
When your really high you cant order into a clowns mouth
Last night we hooked up in nothing but out UK shirts during half time. Never say I'm not a dedicated fan again.
I just got a flashback from Saturday night of you helping me wash my feet in the bar's bathroom.
I make your heart skip a beat like that pivotal moment when you open a public toilet lid
It's like we come as a package. Your slogan should be "be in my family, sleep with my roommate."
My slogan can be "bonding the family together. One dick at a time."
I am 100% planning on being drunk on Wednesday. This is America. Work or no work.
So apparently nutella and chocolate body paint aren't actually the same thing.
Also the bouncer Straight up told me my id was shitty and I should get a new one. But he let me in anyways because #boobz
Do you remember the bathroom attendant when he put out his hand for a tip and you gave him a high five?
I've just had my first cup of coffee in a month and I moaned at the first drink and honestly I think this is the most sexual expreiance in 6 months
I'm both gender and math confused
no, it was more of an i-don't-think-he-even-knows-what-a-clitoris-is, bad.
Randomize
