all I know is if I don't watch spice world right now there will be a firefight.
Oh, don't even get me started. Harry Potter is so pure. Twilight is just teenage girl porn.
I remember asking you "need some dick tonite?"
Yeah I guess to me frat party equals penis party. oh the wonders of vodka.
i fucked her mom dude
there's something to tell the kids
he threw up all over himself while laying down.. it was like watching old faithful, but with noodles and vodka
I AM SAFE. EVERYTHING IS FOG. MISSION ACCOMPLISHED.
He fell off the roof... he clearly has not been preparing for summer.
It was really weird walking into a CVS and not going straight to the pharmacy for plan B.
It would only make sense that I'd cheat on him with his best friend on the ides of march...
Put it this way, at one point I was getting stoned on the roof of the strip club with one of the strippers while another one gave me a free lap dance. That wasn't even the best part of the night.
Trying to Jedi mind trick myself into not throwing up. This is not the esophagus you are looking for.
I finished masturbating now I'm eating french toast crunch. What is life, and what are friends.
First he fixed my gutter. Then he flogged me and fucked me. Then he bought me a new vacuum cleaner. I don't understand Daddy Dom stuff but I ain't mad at it.
As I walked across the lawn after the party got busted, an officer told me to chug my beer before I left the premises.
I dunno about you, but I consider getting eaten out on the porch of a houseboat in -30c in a bridesmaids dress a northern right of passage
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