Is it normal to miss your booty call?
Made out with some random "plus sized" young lady. She let me kiss her boobies. It was like I was 6 months old again.
can you please tell me why I'm bleeding so heavily from my ass and all my makeup is gone?
i was just singing like a virgin out loud my mom told me to stop kidding myself
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Just found a 7-11 receipt for new years eve at 1:30 am apparently we felt the need to buy three jars of pickles and a gallon of milk does this ring any bells?
I am never taking advice from you again. The high heels in the shower were a bad idea. I orgasmed and almost drowned.
Where are you? This girl fell on a baby. She is just gone. Please Hurry
I'm hurrying
Dude. She just shit herself.
Think about if the incredible hulk and king kong had a retarded baby. That's the sound she made in my ear the entire time I fucked her.
That was the apt with beer in the juice and the floor caving in. Don't go.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I realized I was totally the dude in that hook up. I came first and didn't wanna help him finish. And he had paisley sheets.
Me and this random chick had a conversation about how to save the world. 2 words: Dance. Battles. I love drunk heart to hearts in bar bathrooms.
why can't I meet attractive men at the places I like to hang out? like books a million. or the liquor store.
Aw don't be embarrassed. It was all good fun! We've all been there. You can't come to vegas and NOT get a little alcohol poisoning. That's like going to church and not praying.
I am thinking about buying a decorative chest for all our sex stuff....
Oh man. I am high, watching The Office and getting pancakes. What a country.
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