I justed realized that the word 'turd" is present in saturday
Im drinking a beer thats called vuuve which is boobs in begian. I think my life is complete.
today is monday, i feel like we should do something illegal
i just hugged the lady at the liquor store goodbye for the summer...
He keeps trying to sell me the forks from his kitchen drawer
I just fell down the stairs in the library and further deviated my septum. That's why I don't study.
I don't even want to talk about it, I'm traumatized. Even the dog knew to take advantage of the most intoxicated girl at the party...
So where are we on this whole, you write my paper...i do sexual favors situation?
She wants to practice her harmonica skills on my penis
Can you pick up from work today? There's a surprise for you on the bed and I haven't gone blind which is positive.
my goal for the rest of college is to escape STD free. fuck getting a job. this is more important.
Ya apperently its not "appropriate" to fuck in the school auditorium
Well he had a nice beard and it smelled good so there was no way I wasn’t going home with him.
I fell out of my bed whilst trying not to move this morning. I AM ADULT
I had ice cream for breakfast two days in a row.
SUPER ADULTS
Stacy was in the bathroom puking, so he peed out the window. We were eight stories up.
Randomize