...is it true? will i see you next weekend
YES.
ah, i can't wait till there's negative 2 inches between us
I just fell asleep with a sandwich in my mouth at Cosi..people definitely saw
Smoked a bowl on a rollercoaster. Literally ON. Beat that.
I wish there was a non-hangover washing machine that I could stick myself in right now
first off, his name is dougie. strike one.
he saw my boobs and came all over himself... there goes my whole night.
Yeah I hope so. Definately just saw two freshmen in very authentic togas and cotton ball beards. This new class is stepping it up.
She hash tagged the word blow job in her text. Tonight's going to be good.
Unless you're gonna start buying my underwear, you have got to stop ripping it off of me.
This guy dressed as a piece of paper for Halloween, I felt it was only necessary to sign his penis
I can't hangout tonight, I have a phone sex appointment at 10
You kept yelling stranger danger at Nick because he was talking to that girl you didn't like. Your not invited ever again.
I'm hiding in my office refusing to turn the light on holding puke down stealing and shoveling down the meeting snacks and regretting my poor life choices. goldfish crackers are like crack to me right now. how is your day?
You threw up everything but your ovaries.
Well, for starters, you were growling and slurping beer from a puddle on the carpet. Let's all hope that was beer...
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