The weather is perfect in Seattle right now. Warm enough for girls to not wear bras, but cold enough for me to see them nipping out in the shade.
I made out with four boys last night, AND EXCUSE ME WHILE I COUNT HOW MANY GIRLS.
please remind me not to sleep with group members until after finals week.
grown man stumbling drunk down green street wearing nothing but a hot dog costume and crying. its not even noon yet.
I can't believe you broke a Paula dean wooden spoon over my ass
just got home. some guy on my porch is tryin to show me his balls. no more parties at my apartment.
Yeah kinda weird. My grandparents are here for dinner and I'm chilling on the couch close to tripping out on pain killers. My pap asked me how works going and I prettymuch drooled on myself as an answer.
No, no, we have to calibrate. What is the maximum amount of trouble we can get into without going to jail?
I told him he wasn't aloud to one word text me. Unless that one word was threesome
Hay for your next interview you should go in with fake blood on your cloths and tell them you just finished saving a life, then cry
me and him got disney princess makeovers at disneyworld. this is why gay guys make the best friends.
School starts Thursday. Don't fling yourself out of the car to throw up screaming "classy" before I park this time.
It's a new year.
Not sure when or why this happened but I just stopped giving a shit about everything
I JUST AGREED TO GO TO A CHILD'S BIRTHDAY PARTY AT A PLACE CALLED PUZZLE'S FUN DOME WHY DO I HATE MYSELF
? I'm just sitting watching something borrowed alone, crying in my boxers , feel like I should probably do something
Randomize
