ur plase or mine? lol
well if you don't learn how to spell, you may be at your place and I'll be at mine.
Do you want the good news or bad news first?
bad news
The bad news is i thew up on your bed, the good news is i found out who ate your cheetos.
i woke up to 115 texts from him all saying "do you love me??"
Don't ask how or why, but I think the 775 on the inside of my lip is permanent
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Um of course I blew him. He brought me a shamrock shake. It was two o’clock in the morning on St. Patrick’s Day. There was no smoother move basically. He totally earned that head.
FONT CPME TO THE TRUK. I REPATE SONT COME TO THE TRUCK WERE GETTON FRAEKY
he attacked my vagina with the force of a thousand suns
Sext: Bring me pancakes from the midnight breakfast gathering please
He wants me to tell you "my boner misses you"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
who the fuck is meatball and why is he telling you to nap on the bar
With gravity the way it is and your butt clearly being the size of a bus you'd break your hip or something
Ok, maybe playing "whose family is most dysfunctional" wasn't the best drunk idea we've had. Todd''s been crying in the bathroom for an hour. We can't get him out...
Like I could say no to two hot people already naked and fucking. Please. I'm not made of stone.
Twice?!
I just want him to get into an accident where he's horribly disfigured but otherwise fine so he's not so freaking handsome
All I ever wanted was my bed, Tylenol, and total darkness. Instead I had a pervert with porno posters who blares german rock calling me tootsie pop. How was your saturday night?
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