well, atleast the road to alcoholism is fun.
dude your girlfriend loves you alot..she yelled your name lastnight in bed
left comments onEVRY SINGLE1of my posts n status updates.Im done dating freshmen
I just went in my fridge and said to my turkey "see you thursday". I seriously have issues
Just threw up on my desk at work. They are making me go home.
Well someone has to be the Christmas slut at the family dinner. I suppose it's my year to fill those shoes.
Nothing like a marijuana chart of usage in each country to make me understand math.
Ok so now that we've actually had sex do I get the last name or are u really witness protection status?
You will receive a large, large reward, worth much more than the actual phone you are holding, paid not only in cash but in sexual favors, if you return this phone! Please respond if you're interested in cash/sex/or just being a good person. Thanks and hope to hear from you soon!
HE IS COURTING ME WITH CHINESE FOOD AND IT IS WORKING.
I was to tired to jerk him off, so he made me hold it while he thrusted into my hand.
I'm in a bed full of sand, and also just took my contacts out. Whatever happened yesterday was great, I think.
My cat is watching me play with my new vibrator
i found you laying on the floor staring at the ceiling and you kept muttering "why" in various inflections.
No one can explain why there is Dora the Explorer shampoo in my shower...
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