Does having sex in the men's bathroom on the boardwalk count as having sex on the beach?
you ran down to the water at 3am and rolled in the sand and ran around screaming that you were the corn dog monster.
I found her in the bathroom licking her screwdriver off the floor. she said there was no way she was wasting a $6 drink.
i remember you telling me to take a shower, brush my teeth, go get back in bed w her, and "just do what i was born to do." and as soon as i stopped yacking i did just that. you saved my birthday.
Woke up naked next to Alex and he was braiding my hair and then commented on how healthy my hair was. I don't even know anymore..
Just played slippy cup. Flip cup plus slip n slide. What did you do with your fourth of july?
Well I just put wine in my tea
Well, maybe we can talk about it over a drink and some crushed up vicodin.
You literally spelled every word wrong or with numbers except for "drunk", which you used all caps for.
I felt the need to accentuate it....
I don't know what song to play at my bong's funeral!
Speaking of lightening speed, he ate me out while I was watching The Flash. If that's not winning at life idk what is
I thought my holiday spirit was gone this year until I got banged to Christmas music. It's back.
Woah don't start going all boyfriend on me now, you're here for one thing and one thing only and that's sex, hot shameless sex.
Dog. I woke up between my ex boyfriend witch i'm currently fucking and his bestfriend spooning me in MY bestfriends empty powerless house still really fucked up. No one knows what happend.
I dunno about you, but I consider getting eaten out on the porch of a houseboat in -30c in a bridesmaids dress a northern right of passage
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