youre talking to a girl on facebook chat right now and im sitting behind her in class lol. creepy?
he legitimately fell asleep standing up at the club. everyone was impressed
You two kept repeating the same thing over and over. It was like looking after retarded pull-string dolls.
my boss made my mugshot into an 'employee of the month' poster.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i wanted to ask her what his dick looked like but i thought that would be weird for the first time i met her
That's true. There's really no bad time to take a Vicodin.
It is the Reeses peanut butter cup of pharmaceuticals.
Sorry I kept grabbing your vagina at the casino. I believed it was my lucky unicorn to win bonuses
You can cross "give someone a blow job while playing Colors of the Wind" off my bucket list.
Which one of you fuckers thought itd be funny to see if the kitchen table can float.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
2 men making out for 2 seconds to trick a cop so they don't get arrested for being pulled over rolling a blunt is not gay.
I'm gonna take a crap in the portashitter like a civilized human being.
I'm just trying to win a butt plug dude
I decided to do drugs in front of her because if anyone can handle the truth it's a ghost
I don't know what's worse. The fact that my biological mother is an unwitting bigamist, or the fact that my half sister is trying to seduce my girlfriend.
I just bought spray paint, a T-shirt, and a box of magnum condoms. The cashier refused to make eye contact! Haha
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