Literal conversation "you are ________ ____. you facebook friended me"
I just came to the conclusion that the most depressing part of my day is when I have to put clothes on.
my roomate judo was messing around with a girl who recently had a kid, when he was sucking her tits milk came out lmao
i'm thankful for my girlfriend's hot cousins....god, i love her family parties.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I saw a girl walking around campus with bandages on both her knees. I need to get her number.
i really care about you, respect you, another gay word, and another gay word... lets just drink
And the clouds opened up and the sex gods said I hate you alfalfa
Its... i dont even know. theres lots of rap music and i cant find my shoes
Dude I am not desperate enough to pay my dealer in change. Maybe tomorrow.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well despite the fact that I'm still not entirely sure this isn't an elaborate/cunning plan to kill me, I'm in.
If you bring home Chipotle tonight I'll give you an epic bj...ball play and all #datenight
THE AUSTRALIAN IS SINGLE AS FUCK.
When's the best time to point out that all of my orgasms this year have been self-administered? Valentine's day?
i asked her if she was sure that she was ready to do it and she replied with "come at me bro"
Oh btw, ur tongue should count as a second cock it's that good
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