he chased her out of the bar yelling "TAKE MY VIRGINITY" and i havent seen her since
Someone in my class is wearing shirt and on the back it says...National Bible Quiz Finalist 2006. Do you really expect me to find a guy here
Yeah, it was all fun and games until I realized that it wasn't my tent, and I had no idea who those people were
all he has to do is look at me on new years and hes getting laid. thats how hot he is
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Let's play a little game of "Last Night Never Happened"
I was out with the drag queens until 7am. This is the hangover I needed to kick my ass back to sobriety. Dear Virgin Mary, fuck my life.
I fucking give up. OKC is where small penises go to disappoint me.
Also, beer. Big fan.
In other news I may have fractured my masturbating arm
At least it wasn't your drinking arm
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And the next morning he asked me why I had clothes on so I said so that he could take them off again.
If there was a card that said "I'm sorry for throwing up on your bathroom counter" I would send it to you.
Saw my drug dealer at Easter mass with his family so that was weird
I wiped my ass with some girl's sock, I would honestly admit if I hate Caitlin's sandwich.
I just masturbated while watching Say Yes to the Dress
This is what my life has come to
So drunk me is not subtlety trying to get her boss to cheat on her husband and have a lesbian affair with me. Sober me is ok with that.
Randomize