i just walked passed a table of guys by myself.. they looked @ me talked and then yelled 7
id pin you as more of an 8
did he really ask u insert a warm banna in ur anal?
it's already thursday and i haven't gotten drunk yet...something's not right.
i walked in the apt and she was vacuuming. i asked why and she said so we could have sex on the floor. i love clean freaks.
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we banged on the home plate. i wasnt even aware of the significance of where we were until afterwards hahaha
When you're opening a bottle of tequila with a golf club, it's probably time to stop drinking...
And then she banged "the first Italian rapper"
Hey since its national brother week is that eiffel tower option with your girlfriend still on the table?
I've already made the "blackout on move in day" decision
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I have better things to do with my life than be faithful.
DC is easy, you will figure it out.
I'm drunk and blonde. You are wayyyy underestimating this.
You're more than welcome to join us! There's red velvet cake and apparently my pants are open for business I didn't consent to this
It just makes me feel nauseous. And I don't want to feel nauseous when all I really want is to get off.
look, bitch. one day when everyone i care about deserts me for my severe moral depravity, you're going to be the only one i have.
i can't wait.
I once went to target high on hydrocodone. I assure you, they can handle unrespectable.
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