You are not answering and I think it is because you spent 80 dollars worth of drinks on you hot cousin.
Tim hortons said i dont meet their criteria. What the fuck criteria is that? You put bagels in an oven.
So I was just looking through the calendar on my phone seeing what day new years was on & on dec 31st at 9am it says "nude champagne toast". Guess we have to do it.
i think you broke pat's ankle when you drove over it... he's freaking out but on a more serious note i'm 99% sure i saw a werewolf
Yeah I tried to leave with 3 drinks and the bouncer wouldn't let me, I slammed all 3 right in front of him and football spiked them in the trash can
Well, let's be honest here. You're dealing with gay guys... EVERYTHING has an emotional attachment.
she named my penis "gigantor the baby arm"
I want to bury your face in my vagina. Possibly by force. I will try not to suffocate you though.
Caught in the act of lying. Lipstick literally all over his dick. He tried to make some story about darkwing duck or some shit but failed to realize he is a complete moron.
sending him nudies in gran's hospital bathroom. you?
Like I feel like I use my high IQ for the wrong things
I'm 99% sure I just puked glitter. Wine drunk Mondays shouldn't be a thing.
I stared at him for a solid five minutes because he looked like what I imagine god would look like if god was a lumberjack
he gave me a flinstones gummy vitamin and was like, "ya know.. because of ebola."
You're wasting your dick. It needs to be bestowed upon the masses.
Randomize
