garbage
garbage dick
rubbish cock
you win
No seriously, I have to sell the house because my wife found out I'm gay.
Oh my god. I just envisioned myself eating panda meat. I need to get out of this class.
just used a paint mixing cup as a shot glass. thank u art school.
I just had a dream where Bob Saget recognized me from when I hung out with him in a dream I had months ago.
omg. don't know how to spell his name, but hot new zealand guy's dick is magic
I'm sitting on the patient chair, waiting for my vagina to be violated & "i don't want to miss a thing" has been playing on repeat. WHY IS THIS HAPPENING TO ME.
you left a paper here that says 'to do list' but it looks like you just wrote "drink a bunch of cough syrup and watch Who's the Boss" like 60 times
The fact that when I blacked in you were sober enough to kick me out of your roommates bed makes me question our friendship.
Hypothetically speaking, what is the proper response if one gets bitten by a most likely not rabid squirrel? Hypothetically.
That's the last time I get in a car with six rappers headed to god knows where.
So he noticed that I cut a half inch off of my hair. Guess who just earned himself some road head on the way to the twin cities?
I came home with 30lbs of BBQ last night. I can't pick up women in a bar but I sure can pick up leftovers from a corporate party.
Is it something I'm going to want to hug you for or slap you for?
on the bright side i found your panties and the lid to the nutella
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