are you wasted or are you getting laid?
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wow
Are they hot? And are the slutty? These are my concerns for any wedding. You say yes, and yes, I will be your best man
Nothing says true friendship like 2 people bonding over potentially having AIDS.
Don't worry about it. Anal sex isn't always sunshine and wildflowers.
But seriously, I hug most of my drug dealers.
Dude. Yeah. This is a game changer. I feel dirty and possibly pregnant and it hasn't happened yet.
Just checked my voicemails on the work phone on speaker. Thank you so much for the one of you screaming "COME FUCK ME NOWWWW!" my boss loved it ..
I want to throw all of their shoes in the pool so I feel like there is some justice in the world
It was drunk tag. I was Alice in wonderland chasing a ballerina who was chasing Lance Armstrong who had needles in his arms.
Texas awaits me. And all the cocks that live there too.
I guess I can give it a shot. I usually just get belligerently drunk and go where my penis and feet lead me. No fights or getting too lost, so they seem to be doing a good job
What i love about my dog is i can lay in bed and masturbate with him at the foot, and he just leaves me alone.
Literally sucked a dick for ten seconds before I said to myself, this tiny ass penis isn't worth it. My night last night
I do not love him. There is no love. Only sex and meatloaf.
Omg I got up from his bed and almost did a header into the wall because I came so many times I forgot how to walk.
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