I just walked in on my dad looking at porn. is there protocol for this?
i scrubbed and i scrubbed and i scrubbed and i still was a whore
Seriously man, I'm worried that my dick's going to fall off someday if I keep this up...
And you kept repeating "I didn't know know that this was a no blow job zone."
My only expectation is honesty. And three orgasms every time.
Do me a favor? If you get with him, please lick his abs. Someone has too they're just too beautiful not to.
Don't judge them too harshly for getting kicked out of a strip club. Happens to the best of us.
You are the coolest girlfriend ever.
we got her to the bathroom intime. all she could say was 'now my bladder is empty just like my soul'
I talk a lot when I drink rum. he was going down on me and i was telling him how i wished i could tap dance. oh god
Dear god. Please. Please do NOT deprive yourself of dick for 90 days. Blood will spill. Wolverines will howl. I can't handle that kind of terror.
yeah well, its not like my astrogynecology class is teaching me what i need to know
im almost 90% sure there is no such thing as astrogynecology.
He offered me handsanitizer after a hand job, you can't tell me he's not perfect!
To me, you're the Patron Saint of good music and handjobs
How the fuck do you get a noise complaint filed against you at 9:30am on a fucking Tuesday?
mcfuck me up
MCFUCK ME UP INSIDE
Randomize
