you dont want to live with me, im always naked, a chronic masturbator, a bit of a voyeur and will likely touch you while you sleep. ps- i can pick locks
You should see the damage i did to the apartment last night. So many broken things and butter sticks stuck to windows.No memorys
She still cant shoot whiskey?
Im having serious doubts about this relationship
Found your glasses drenched in ketchup on my driveway this morning
I think not having bongs in close range is good for my academia
do you know how hard it is to bring up the "what do I do if you conk out while we're fucking" conversation while maintaining the dignity of.the narcaleptic girl you just met?
Honesty, no. I just want to shower you with hot dogs.
Someone the age of your son tried to go home with me from the bar last night
I was gonna jerk off, but then I thought about that movie last night and it killed that idea. I have serious boner trauma.
Just whisper "I fucked your boyfriend" in her ear and be done with it.
I accidentally sent my mom a nude picture of my ass... she replied with how did you get that angle ?
Well, I like big penises but it's not like he walks around with it out or anything so yes I think he has beautiful eyes
We were supposed to have sex but we had smoked so much neither of us wanted to move.
he's like the highest ranking tongue wizard i know.
I'm seriously scared right now. Woke up next to 3 geese and a lot of feathers ..
Randomize
