just had a dream there were parent teacher conferences in college...scariest dream ever.
It's not just about fucking anymore... We decided we're actually in like now..
The only coherent words in the 6 texts i recieved were don't, cute, fucking, beer, and lions
All I know is I had a penis in one hand a bottle of wine in the other
Because it is about to snow, I sent him for Diet Coke and cigarettes. It's the gay version of milk and bread.
Being at this bar with grandma is a real cockblocker
Had to awkwardly dig through all my fake ID's to get my real one so I could vote.......Model citizen over here.
oh, you know. just sitting in my bed high as fuck wearing a windbreaker and watching british tv.
Ok, it is technically a gay bar but it's a total dive w/ strong drinks. The important thing is you can start drinking at 11:00 am without judgement
oh oh oh, and apparently you can bring in your own snacks. Some old dude just gave me cashews and cheetos.
it's gotten to the point where there are no existing good choices. even our good choices are bad choice by anyone's standards but ours.
My god this is going to ruin whatever Vegas left of our souls...
My arms are hairy. And so Is my left leg. Just my left leg, the right is smooth.
Six words: 3rd Degree Burn On My Dick
She throws back shots like they are NO-THING. I swear, she goes through like five straight tequila shots, does a jello shot, chases with half a hot dog, has a rum and coke, and then takes her shirt off and makes an impromptu bandage out of it for fuckin' Tim who cut himself on the flagpole. I'm going to marry her.
Is it bad that I like to have a guy to flirt with in every class? I feel like it's excellent motivation: to shave, to shower and to show up.
Randomize
