I may or may not have screamed I'M ON A BOAT while having sex...on a boat. I think I was born to have sex with him.
I don't think cute and don't forget to get tested belong in the same text
how am i supposed to spank it to a shakira video when she looks like she is doing the robot?
Maury Povich's contact info is in our database at work...i should steal it right?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I need to not be around brick walls while intoxicated.
We've finally come to the understanding that as long as our conversation stays stricaly sexual, we get along.
you just used a box of cheese-its to get into the bar
How do you set tits on fire ? I swear her tits were on fire.
3 things. 1) we need alcohol 2) we need alcohol 3) we need tortilla chips. Let's make a plan. Bro shakes and salsa.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
White grape blunt wraps are like the equivalent of a glass of wine in a tux.
I ended up naked with smirnoff caps on my nipples. Dignity is now a completely foreign concept to me.
I can feel my teeth in 4 dimensions. I shouldnt be this high at 8 in the morning.
The more I piece together last night the more I want to vomit it out of my brain.
Girl, he's like catnip for my pussy.
Want to go to Victoria’s Secret? His fiancée is out of town and I’m going to try and stop the wedding with lingerie and lots adventurous sex
Absolutely! I love a good sexual filibuster!
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