I couldnt find her vag and just started laughing uncontrollably. She was not pleased. Neither was i.
What a tease, dude. She's giving me emotional blue balls.
all i wanted was to be slutty. now i'm meeting him for drinks tomorrow because he woke up before i had a chance to sneak out and was too polite to say no
still finding ketchup in my shoes. thanks to graduation that is probably the last time ill ever say that..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Sometimes familiar penis is best. Its like comfort food for your vagina.
Just found a g string in our driveway, wtf happened this weekend?
Here's the level of my committment: I'm not participating in the Olympic opening ceremonies drinking game. THIS IS SERIOUS.
BTW my friend remembers her as "the one with the pronounced chin"
Maybe we should invest in one and when one of us wishes to be a hot mess in a wheel chair the other one will push the mess around to wherever it wants to go.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Debating going to the grocery store with my vibrator still in, cause I can't stand the idea of it out. Lets do some risk/reward
He's easy on the eyes, light on his feet, and rough in bed...what more could a girl ask for in a rebound?
College has done two things for me. Given me the confidence to blow my nose in public and shit in public
You were so fucked you introduced me to a pile of Laundry
I wondered why I slept in the front room
Dude, the worst part is I can't even pretend it didn't happen because she posted a video of it on Facebook.
Oh and ps....i was sleeping soundly until i woke up by the sound of amy on the phone with her mom sobbing hysterically because she cant stop having the shits.
Randomize