maybe tonight we can turn coloring into a drinking game
can you call in chlamydia to work? like if the antibiotics they gave you for it are giving you the shits...
It would be celebrated in history as "the orgasm heard round the world"
I have vodka an food stamps. At some point today, that will undoubtedly turn into jello shots.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
THERE IS THE SEXIEST BEARDED MAN HERE. I CAME EVERYWHERE.
so i might have figured out why that girl isn't talking to me...I'm 90% confident I didn't give her a pillow when she stayed over >.>
They should incorporate dolphins into professional surfing
i dont know whats worse..that i woke up in a gorilla suit or that its covered in peanut butter
The only word that describes how much hair I shaved off of my ass is "considerable".
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you told the taxi driver your yeast infection was so bad you wanted to F a popsicle
I told him I wish we were at my house cause then I could tell him to get out after we had sex.
He's good looking but he really sounds like kermit the frog, can you imagine how fucking him would sound like?
Yep that's the face of someone whose dick I would put in my mouth without hesitation
Being an adult can't be all bad. I just took a vacation day solely to sit around and get stoned
Sorry. Im too sleepy to penis.
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