try this...when you orgasm scream his address including city state and zip...
there is a homeless man oan crack poledancing on a fence... now hes humping it...
Eating a girl out that was just in the ocean does not make her taste like saltwater taffy
Just snuck alcohol into the hospital for my mom.
Life's too short to consider the larger psychological underpinnings of my lust.
She compares her life to Teen Mom. She's 28.
I decided to buy a keg of Miller Lite instead of paying the electric bill. Just thought I'd give you a heads up...
If I won't even leave the house for sex tonight. I definetly not going out for anything else.
I had to take the fire extinguisher from him. He was just sitting on the floor petting it.
everyone thought he was too sick to make it, but he showed up. Ten minutes in and he's doing vodka shots with nyquil chasers
trading diseases for a hangover? that's either a really good decision or a really, really bad one. we'll find out if he wakes up tomorrow
I specialize in how to hang out and party with randoms after you've hooked up with them. Not in feelings.
you told the police officer you wanted to be just like her one day but not a lesbian
I smoked my last bong as the sun rose. It was magical.
Well we can add this to the list of 'where the hell did that bruise come from?'
Dude i just passed out while getting head...she cried
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