i finally understand why guys leave in the middle of the night.......they got it right
they started a semi-successful rumor that toby keith died. who says fraternities don't have goals
i'm considering texting him with "i'm leaving the country for a year, wanna fuck?"
do it. it's every man's dream.
His roomates just started party boying me. He stood there with the look of horror on his face.
I was just counting ceiling tiles when he ate me out, it was that bad.
Am I the only one creeped out by the guy asleep behind our couch?
No worries you cant actually turn into a wine snob if you brew it in your closet....
i pretended i was deaf and got a girl to come home with me
He is making me drink his THC water out of a milk jug.
I think that's the first time I've heard someone say "this is the safest way of doing things" while holding half a gallon of jagermeister
I looked the guy across the room straight in the eyes and said, "If you were any closer to me, we'd be making out right now."
Dude, you like sabotaged my shower time by walking in and eating a snack pack on the toilet. That's messed up on levels that haven't even been created.
hotboxing with the ex-bf's two most recent hookups. they just realized they're eskimo sisters with his best friend. this is what happens when I come home for Christmas.
His dick looks just like him, taller than average, thick, and somehow always angry.
We're having soft pretzels and cheese dip for dinner tonight. Like fucking adults.
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