I have new birth control, three bottles of jack, and some coupons for micky d's. You wanna have that sleepover?
he rubbed his balls on my face to wake me up.. this friends with benefits thing is getting out of hand.
I've got to stop making out with the guys and sharing drinks with you. I'm the reason we all get sick at the same time. Sorry.
Yea you just drank all the Hookah water, then started talking gibberish about the Kool Aid you just drank.
No, I've only ever seen his brother's dick. So when I have lucid sex dreams, I just do a little cut and paste in my mind and stick his bro's package onto him.
Can we do a version of last night where I actually remember shit?
Don't look him in the eyes, it like looking at the sun but instead of burning your retinas it makes you wet and vulnerable
just peed in rthe mens room but seranaeded them with adelle the whole timee so they didnt mind
Will it be a clothes optional week when I get there? I have an amazing outfit of tattoos and toenail polish planned.
I've seen people win free drinks for a lot less dude, no need to drop trou on a piano.
I just blocked a guy on grindr for having a little dick. See? I do have standards.
You have 4 bottles of kahlua in ur drawers but no sox
Oh great. I guess I'm second on that list now that we've confirmed she's not a lesbian AND that was her sister.
I HAVENT HAD A NICE A NICE DICK SINCE FEBRUARY!! I WANNA KEEP THIS ONE!!!
I threw up all of my purple drank and thats really important
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