I told her I was pledging and she immediately proposed to give me head in the bathroom. i love how easy rushees are
White Russians with skim milk. Fuck I'm healthy.
Hungover. Be in at noonish. Turn my monitor on and put a hot cup of coffee on my desk so the boss thinks I'm in
I may or may not have puked in my RA's suggestion box.
there is way too much butter on my body for this to be okay
After skinny dipping in your pond, I think me and tequila have added a whole new dynamic to our relationship.
I'm not sure how exactly, but this funeral has turned into a ridiculous night of drinking games
This guy in a neck brace is ordering bottle service at the strip club. Not sure whether to applaud his commitment or scorn his addiction. It's a draw.
Apparently I was the fucked up drunk guy greeting people at the hotel in the lobby last night.
I gave up. I'm crying over my notes. Oh, ya know, just another drunk finals week
Given everything we have talked about, is it wrong to ask you to be faithful to me, despite still dating him?
please don't fuck her on my bed i'm too poor for laundry quarters
ARE YOU THINKING VAGINA THEMED RESTAURANT
I would sacrifice a finger for two more hours of sleep.
Had a burrito last night in your honor
That's the nicest thing you've ever done
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