drug dealer added me on facebook, win ?
omg no way im finding him!
he has no pics of his face, and im always drunk so i cant remember if hes cute or not, but he told me im in his phone as "party girl" which is fitting i guess cause im dragging my hungover ass to buy preggo tests, and i had to get the cheap ones cause i blew all my cash on coke.
you yelled that ur labia majora was swollen at 3 am in the dorm hallway
If Bret Micheals dies..will VH1 have to go off the air?
so exactly what does one wear to an abortion clinic?
You know me. Don't need roses, just dick and food.
Please don't let me drink ever again. I apparently told him he could stay but as there was no room in the bed he'd have to lie on top of me and he'd need to anchor himself on with his penis so he didn't fall off.
You have all of her herpes and none of my sympathy
Slept in my car last night. It snowed. I peed on the street. Hello 29...
We had car sex in the parking lot of the dispensery while he blasted Tony Bennett. It was so fucking romantic.
We tried lying really still and being really quiet so that he wouldn't notice us before he left the room. Forgot about the glow in the dark condom.
Front seat of an Escalade in a limo-service parking lot. That is all.
I have so many plans for this weekend and sobriety is not invited.
I completely forgot about the posting of partying pics shortly after adding my gma my dad was like grandma says your all over fb but she doesn't know how to use it. Of course I'm all over her fb. She's got 6 friends I am her newsfeed
Just bought condoms with a walmart gift card. Thanks grandma.
I would be down to associate sex w taco bell
Randomize
