just saw an old couple make out...not too sure how I feel about it. though I will admit at one point I was thinking "oh yeah! get that!"
Spotted: jayne dropping her cigarettes in a puddle...then picking them back up and putting them in her pocket. If i ever get that desperate, stop talking to me
It's just like soggy cereal, but cancerous
I am about to get in a knife fight over a corn dog.
its sad that the first thing i assume is that ur trying to indirectly tell me you fucked on a breakfast table
by asking you if you bought one for the apartment?
sometimes i wish i was the girl in a porno. that way if i couldn't get any, i'd just order a pizza and do him.
I feel like I am becoming dumber sitting here in class than I would be sitting on the couch smoking weed.
I bet you think you're really funny for switching my line of coke with a line of protein powder.
I don't think I own any pants that haven't seen his bedroom floor anymore...
I think I've officially made out with the entire starbucks staff.
Either I'm spending too much time drinking or my perfume is starting to smell like a pineapple vodka.
I was talking about you wanting my dick, but that works too
Okay I know I said I was going to quit drinking for a while but apparently pumpkin pie flavored vodka is a thing and I will not rest until I have some.
Soooo you know how I said I was trying to be a rational adult? Well that led to me fucking a rational adult today.
I've only fucked to 2 Fleetwood Mac songs, that must be why my life feels so empty.
my birth father cheated on his wife with my birth mother. it's literally in my blood to be a home wrecker.
Randomize
