Obv we're gonna bbm each other in bed
Then I opened the closet and then i found the babies
i just realized i've hooked up with every boy in this taco bell
That's the classiest thing you've ever said.
Please don't die.. At a gay bar... On a Wednesday. Obituaries are not allowed to be that entertaining.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The only reason I give him head is because I know i'll get a back rub.
wow.
But it's a REALLY good back rub.
My broken door handle makes it really inconvient for when i need to puke at red lights.
He just "revenge puked" on her kid. I think we'll be leaving soon.
Well the nurse forgot to take all my stitches out, so my surgical tools are peroxide, kitchen scissors, fingernail clippers, a pocket knife, and 11 beers. Let's do this...
We have 10 gallons of home brew. And james has an amazonian blow dart weapon that sticks in bags and the wall. Come over
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I will give you 100$, a blow job a day for a month and I will shave my legs according to societal standards until next November if you come recuse me from my night class right NOW.
Drunbk and roasting marshmallows on my stove. Accidentally singed the catr's fur but she'sd alright.
Hate you missed the after party, I was covered in dish soap gliding bare assed down a slip n slide at 6:30 this morning
He let me finish eating my sandwich while I sat his face. I think I'm in love with this little eager beaver.
I mean, he drove your car and it burst into flames, if anyone cant be trusted, it's him.
I want to ride his face like a jet ski
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