I think i peed on brittanys purse
dude, i just saw a bobcat while i was rollerblading this morning
1 dont ever text someone @ 8am on sat. 2 dont ever admit to rollerblading past 1992.
He brought over a 20 dollar bottle of wine. Who does that? This is college.
Outside the community dumpsters: beer bottles and a carton of orange juice. Looks like we were here.
Just wanted to make sure that my favorite hot mess is still alive. I dont need words, just a response of any sort. K hope youre living
bhystjhitsjhtiajielrfrhaug
This is sufficient.
his mom and i are swapping prescript pills..totally mother in law material.
I'm stuck on the dance floor between two fat people. I don't think they feel my existence. Please help.
i was like his sober eyes girls would come up to us, show us theirs and if approved by me blew him, if rejected they went to my truck with a bottle of patron
Are you high?
The snorkel mask makes that pretty clear
How much booze could a drunk brad chug when a drunk brad does chug booze?!?
All. The answer is always all
Banana suit guy has an entourage and they're all douchebags. There is no god.
he told me he didn't like my name so he was going to call me Casey instead
the party picked up after I got pretty drunk...I got kicked in the fucking head by a tiny lesbian...she was 5'1" I did not think she could do it...i was very wrong
My mom is dancing slutty on the bar I need more drinks to be ok with this
just woke up with nickles taped to my body. theres like a dollar worth.
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