She rubs her butt on the bed & then she growls..
just threw up on dog. broke microwave with cheese and spoon. having a bath with my barbies singing final countdown.
before you ask yes i found the absinthe under your bed. ITS THE FINAL COUNTDOWWWWNNNNNN
I decided tomorrow is going to be great day wether my period likes it or not
One good thing out of all this is her ass is huge. Like Australia Big.
I can't believe she made out with my 15 year old brother. That kid can seriously pull.
Hold on. At Sephora trying to decide what despair smells like.
But in defense of this shit summer we've had, I totally perfected my shotgunning skills. I have achieved my summer goal.
sexting foreigners is the best. they respond with silly things like "love that tits"
he fell asleep naked and all I'm doing is staring at his weird balls
I feel like asking for a towel for after I puke before I puke to be more respectful than jus going outside to puke and coming back inside covered in sweat and tears.
I started the day with dreams of getting laid and ended it with the reality of eating Taco Bell in my bed with my dog.
he pulled my tampon string out with his teeth like a grenade pin yelling frag out! That's why I fuck guys back from deployment. They'll go the distance
Literally just sitting around waiting for someone to come along and fuck my chakras back into alignment
I haven't gotten dressed in 4 days. God bless you, unemployment.
I always feel bad for the sober driver... Never been me but I feel bad... empathetic AF
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